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Vasectomy Diary – Part II

…Continued from Vasectomy Diary – Part I

Without further delay, the conclusion to one Dad’s vasectomy adventure.

11:00 – I am called and walk in to the hospital room, the nurse goes over some last minute things, reiterating that the procedure is to be considered “non-reversible”, asks me to sign some more forms and then tells me to disrobe and place a blanket over me, the doctor will be in shortly. Time passes slowly when you are alone in a hospital room facing a scalpel – very slowly. 15 minutes go by and the nurse comes in again, she apologies, the doctor has had an emergency but that he is almost finished and will be in shortly.  I am slow to react – what type of emergency? what procedure did the person have? Time moves even slower.

11:30 - The doctor comes in and apologies, but we are ready to go. I look at the clock, my wife might be coming through the door if we don’t get this show on the road soon. The doctor starts by disinfecting the area, I am not sure what the substance was, I think it was iodine, then he tells me that I will feel a pinch as he injects the anesthetic, and while I will be numb I may feel some discomfort in the lower abdomen.  Ah, check and check.

The first incision is made in the scrotum; I only know this because in between the stories of fantasy football and baseball he is describing what he is doing – I am not watching. I tell him I can feel a little more than pressure at some point and I am given more anesthetic.

The procedure involves cutting the scrotum and pulling the vas deferens through the incision to cut and cauterize them.  ”One down,” he says. We share more stories about where we grew up, went to college, and vacation spots, and the next thing I know we are finished, stitches and all – 12:05pm.

He packs the area with gauze and helps me put on my jock strap and gives me directions: antibiotics to reduce the chance of infection, Advil and Tylenol for the pain, ice for the swelling, rest, no sex for a week (I must have made a funny face because sex was the last thing I was thinking about, but he said you would be surprised), and no heavy lifting for a week.  With that I am at the desk to schedule my follow-up visit in 2-3 weeks.

I meet my wife out in the parking lot (yes, she did come into the office while I was in there – they told her that we were delayed in our start), she looks nervous, but I am giddy, cracking jokes and everything. I walk out of the office and proclaim “Honey, I am packing” referring to all the gauze in the jock strap.  I think it is the release of the nerves, plus I can’t feel anything at all that makes me so jovial. She asks how it went and I give her the blow by blow, we chat on the way to the pharmacy to pick up my script for the antibiotics. We get home and she and the kids are off quickly – she was nice enough to set-up a play-date for the kids at the neighbors so I will be able to get some rest with my feet up for the afternoon – good stuff.

4pm – I have been dutifully following directions, feet-up, ice pack, Tylenol & Advil, but the anesthetic has worn off at this point and I am starting to feel things – nothing really bad, more like a dull pain and I am very limited in my movements.

5pm – I have to urinate and I’ll admit, I am somewhat hesitant to go. Off to the bathroom I trudge, pull down my sweatpants and my boxer briefs and finally the jockstrap and gauze – I am amazed at how swollen and black and blue everything is. I know enough about the human body to know what is connected to what, but looking at the stitches, in the back of my mind I am worried about urinating and having the stitches break.  Not to worry though – all is well and I am relieved again. That is the routine for the rest of the night and on Saturday the hardest thing is having my two children around and them wanting to jump on my lap – I put a throw pillow over my groin and that keeps everything clear.

Sunday – My son has soccer Sunday morning. I grab the tailgate chair (you know the blue nylon ones with the cup holder), cup of coffee and head to the field. My daughter and I sit on the far away sidelines and watch, it is nice to be outside, but it takes some effort and by the end of the game I am tired, back to the couch for a nap and more ice.

Monday – Back to work, I am slower than normal, and I played it off at work that I twisted my knee over the weekend, so I am a little gimpy; no one seems the wiser. The first day is the worst, no ice in the office and I am tired at the end of the day, but all-in-all I am ok.  I ice when I get home.

Tuesday-Friday – Each day I am getting stronger and the swelling and black & blue is reducing. I notice that I have some pressure in my lower abdomen and I originally worry that I might have a hernia, but a call into the Doctor confirms that this is normal, just blood that needs to dissipate.  By Friday of that week the stitches from the incision sites fall out and the site has healed.

The Following week – By the second week, I have forgotten about the procedure, some slight movements remind me, but nothing major and I am not in pain, time for the follow-up visit.

My follow-up visit is a quick one, the doctor does a physical exam and we speak about things, he says all seems normal, reminds me to continue to use birth control and gives me the instructions on the 3 month analysis to see if my swimmers are still swimming.

June 15th – I follow the instructions and drop off the specimen to the doctor, and a few days later I get a call from my doctor that all is well.

Overall, I am happy with our decision to have the procedure done.  Yes, there was some pain and discomfort, but it was very bearable and I was able to have some laughs along the way. The pluses outweighed the negatives for my wife and I, and I would recommend the procedure to anyone that was curious about it, just remember the procedure name when you get to the doctor.

Read other posts by Threeboysandagirl

Fatherhood Friday at Dad Blogs

3 Responses to “Vasectomy Diary – Part II”

  1. stefan says:

    wow. thanks for sharing. one to bookmark for just the right time. yikes. not there yet!

  2. Patrick says:

    I’m surprised you did not mention the crazy ichiness of hair growing back especially a week or so afterwards.

  3. Tony W says:

    Thank you for your blog. Most stories on the net about the procedure are horror stories, thank you for sharing

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